The Storms of Life

I met with a dear friend of mine yesterday for lunch, a friend I haven’t seen or talked to in years. A few years back we attended bible studies together, did lunch and coffee regularly and had become very close friends. It was 2019 when she began struggling with severe depression and suicidal thoughts. The last time we hung out before she isolated herself and cut off all communication with me, she told me she was suicidal. She told me that she thought about taking her own life daily. We sat on her couch holding each other and we wept for hours...... After this admission, she cut communication with me and this would be the last time I would see her for two years.

It was a joy filled reunion yesterday as the two of us sat for hours talking, laughing and crying. It was as if no time had passed since the last time we saw each other. As we were chatting she shared her powerful testimony of what the Lord had done in her life the last couple years. She told me that things got so bad that she decided it was time to end it all. As she sat at the end of her bed preparing herself to go through with it, she told me that the Lord intervened. She said out of nowhere a thought popped into her head and she remembered a book her brother had wanted her to read. He gave it to her a while back thinking it would be helpful knowing she was dealing with such darkness. She had put it on her shelf and forgotten about it, but in that moment she decided to grab the book and read it instead of ending her life. She was captivated by the book and she told me she read the whole thing in a few hours. As she read it she said she had never felt so loved and comforted by the Lord. This was the turning point for her.

In the days to come she began to seek the Lord and He began opening her eyes to the truth. She told me she felt trapped in the darkness and didn’t know how to escape it, until she experienced the light. The Lord began teaching her how to fight and she grew extremely dependent and close to the Lord in this time of darkness. She started to recognize the lies for what they were.. LIES. The lies she believed were that she wasn’t needed in this world, that she didn’t have a purpose, that no one would miss her, that she was a burden to others, that the best option was to end her life. She told me that the lies seemed so real at the time and she believed them to be true, but as the Lord walked her out of the darkness she began to see the truth.

It was amazing seeing the transformation in my dear friend yesterday. She was filled with so much joy, love and light! The most powerful thing she told me was this…

“ I am so grateful for my suffering Kara. I absolutely hated it while I was going through it, but now I see the good that came from it. Now I see what I need most in my life… It’s the Lord. I couldn’t have done it without Him. Before this I never really thought of God throughout my day, but now He is the first person I talk to when I wake up in the morning. I never knew that I could have such a personal relationship with Him. I grew up religious, but that always felt like God was up there and I was down here. I tried to please Him, I tried to do all the right things, but religion never felt real to me. I always had some doubt that God really existed, I never felt close to Him… But it’s different now, I don’t know any better blessing than knowing God in this way. My suffering, the Lord used it for good Kara. Look at what He’s done!!!! I feel so close to Him now, like we are one, like His Spirit lives in me.”

Her words resonated with me deeply because I too experienced darkness that I didn’t know was possible and I too got to experience the miraculous power of the Lord. I couldn’t agree more with my friend when she said there was no better blessing in this life than to know the Lord deeply and personally.

When Jesus was preparing to depart this world, he knew that difficult days lay ahead for His disciples. He made it clear to them that they could not depend on themselves to survive the trials and persecution they would soon endure. Instead, they would have to rely entirely on Him. He wanted them to be ready for the most challenging times they would ever face. He left them with these words,

“I have told you all this so that you may have peace in me. Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows. But take heart, because I have overcome the world” John 16:33

Amid the storms of life in a dark and fallen world, I’ve found that inner peace is only possible through a relationship with Jesus Christ. The inner peace that the scriptures talk about, it’s real! I never understood it or believed it until I experienced it. When I keep my eyes on Jesus and draw near to Him, He has a way of providing everything I need. Hope when things feel hopeless, inner peace when things around me feel chaotic, comfort when I am lonely, truth when I am plagued by lies, strength when I am weak, and guidance when I feel lost. His truth has set me free and His perfect love casts out fear. If you are feeling the heaviness, darkness and hopelessness that comes from living in a broken world, I want you to know that you are not alone

Then Jesus said, “Come to me, all of you who are weary and carry heavy burdens, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you. Let me teach you, because I am humble and gentle at heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy to bear, and the burden I give you is light.” Matthew 11:28-30