A few weeks ago I was watching a documentary on Netflix where some of the most hardened criminals were being interviewed. One of the first episodes was with a murderer who was in prison for life. The show consisted of multiple interviews with this man that spanned over about a year or more. In the beginning he recapped his childhood and adolescent years. To my surprise he didn't seem to think it was that bad, but I was shocked at the dysfunction, hatred and evil he was exposed to at such a young age, my heart hurt for him.
As I continued to watch I was baffled by the man's demeanor in the last interview. He no longer seemed so hardened like he came across in the first few interviews. I was curious to know why…I feel like I got my answer when one of the man's relatives was interviewed. This man had never met his relative before he started visiting him in prison. The relative said that he felt as though God was leading him to reach out and connect with this man after he found out he was in prison. The transformation I saw throughout the documentary was astonishing. It encouraged me as I saw this man's heart soften and saw the power that love can have in a person's life.
How many times do we cast people off thinking they aren't deserving of our love. That we get to pick and choose who we show our love to. After watching this show I was challenged. I thought to myself, am I showing love to those that are mean to me, have a different opinion than me, look different or vote different than me? What about those that have wronged me... Am I loving those people? I even thought to myself, if I was given the chance would I show love to the murderer, the drug addict, the prostitute, the rapist? Or would I look down on them thinking they weren’t worthy of my love?
Most of my life I was deceived into thinking that my enemies were those that were mean to me, wronged me, talked bad about me, but as I seek the Lord I’ve realized we aren’t each other's enemies, evil is our enemy. We are so busy fighting with each other we lose sight of the real enemy. The biblical perspective warns us that “Our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.” (Ephesians 6:12) This scripture is saying that it is evil and hatred we should be fighting against, not each other. The story of that man in prison was so encouraging to me because even though evil and hatred are present, they are not more powerful than our God.
1 Corinthians 13:4-7 tells us that, “Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.” This scripture tells us that love is not a feeling, love is an action... but do my actions display this kind of love? I used to think love was the mushy, lovey, sentimental “feeling of love”, but that’s not what it says biblically. Love isn’t about the feelings you feel... those feelings will come and go and they change like the wind. When I was led by my emotion it was destructive in my life. It was easy to love people, especially my husband and kids when my feelings were mushy and loving, but when they weren’t .. Yikes… I didn’t like who I was when I was controlled by my emotion. God calls us to love regardless of our feelings and that always seemed impossible, but as I seek the Lord I’ve been encouraged as I’ve seen so much growth in that area! When I let the Lord lead rather than my emotion, I feel like I am on such solid ground.
The best thing is.....God doesn’t leave us to love in our own strength. He calls us to seek and follow Him, so we can love in His strength. That doesn't mean we will ever love perfectly, but when are hearts are transformed by the One who knows only perfect love, that's when we can shine a light in the darkness. I know I am not capable in my own strength to love as radically as the way Paul describes in 1 Corinthians, but I trust God wouldn’t make that a standard if He wasn’t going to help me in my efforts to love that way. I don’t want to fight with harsh words and hatred I see how unproductive that is, I want to learn how to fight in God’s strength and with His love! I have hope as I seek the Lord that He will create in me a heart that loves better each and everyday and that my love will not only have power in my marriage, my parenting and my friendships, but that it also shines a light in a world that seems so very dark at times.
1 Peter 4:8
Most important of all, continue to show deep love for each other, for love covers a multitude of sins.
John 13:34
So now I am giving you a new commandment: Love each other. Just as I have loved you, you should love each other.
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