A couple weeks ago after church one of my kids decided to steal a piece of candy from the candy bucket. Seriously, it's always gotta be my kid 😂 His sister did what she does best and started to whine and complain, "why does he get two pieces of candy and I only get one" …. BUSTED
What came next kind of shocked me a lil bit. When I told him to put the candy back his response was,
"WHY? I don't want to… it’s only a piece of candy"...
OH HECK no.. He did not just say that to me. I thought for sure he would feel bad that he got busted and would be willing to put it back… obviously I was WRONG 🤦
His attitude lately….. For real…UGH… #CheckYourHeartBOY....
I glared at him for a long second and he knew the look. He reluctantly went and put it back. When we were walking out to the car, he continued to give me attitude, "Mom, it was just a piece of candy, I don't get it, why are you so upset? It's not a big deal".
To be honest, I used to sometimes steal candy from the sample station at the store growing up ….(I definitely didn't disclose that information to my son)🤫…Remember those Brach's candies that you could pay a nickel or a dime to sample? I haven't seen one of those since I was a kid, but I would pretend to put a coin in the slot and then I would sneak a piece of candy…like hello...that's where my kid gets it from…#WeAreSuchStealers #OMGoodness …
Anyways my point is ...I wasn't really all that upset about the candy being taken, I understand kids make mistakes..I was more shocked by his response and by the fact that he had no care in the world that he had just done something wrong. He gave me attitude instead of showing remorse or regret for what he had done. I might have seemed "mad" or disappointed, but really, I was sad. I know first hand that when you continue to brush aside sin thinking it's just “small" sin, you begin to get real comfortable with it.
Being comfortable in your sin is not a good place to be. I've been there in regards to my anger. I definitely learned the hard way how powerful sin can be. I thought I had it “under control” initially, but it kept getting worse. I kept brushing it aside and as a result I became more and more comfortable with it. When I was in a dark place, the sin was what had a hold on me. Even though sin may seem "small", sin always leads to more sin and when we keep sin active in our lives it will slowly steal our joy, kill our hope, and destroy our lives. Sin wreaks havoc in our relationships, friendships, our marriages, our parenting...it will cause dysfunction in every area of our life.
The scriptures make it very clear that God not only hates sin, but also hates the impact sin has on His people. He warns of the destruction it causes in our lives. Often times when I look back at some of the darkest moments in my life, I see how things could have been different if I would have just heeded God's warning. The point I was trying to convey to my son was, sin is never "small" and once it starts to seem that way, that ain't good. I didn't want my son to get comfortable with that "small" sin... because then what? If he gets comfortable with that ...what comes next? When we don't take sin seriously and we brush it aside as if it's no big deal, it only leads to more sin which leads to more sin.
I understand sin isn't the most fun thing to talk about and it can be embarrassing. I could tell my son felt that way the night after he got caught. In our embarrassment we try and justify our sin. After hearing my son say…. "WHAT!?!? I didn’t do anything wrong”....Who cares..”I could see he was trying to justify what he had done, trying to make his sin "right" in his own eyes. He also tried to make excuses for it and blame others. I could empathize, I’ve done that too and I've felt the same feeling of embarrassment, shame and guilt many times. I explained to him how easy it is to want to hide our sin, but how important it is that we not allow our feelings of pride, shame, and embarrassment keep us from going to the Lord with it.
God not only forgives sin, but He also softens our heart and convicts us of sin. I want my children to always feel that uncomfortable feeling when they do wrong. That's the Lord working. God doesn't make us feel guilty, that's the enemy, but what God does is makes us aware of when we are sinning so we can go to him with it and he can free us from the weight of it. He also provides the strength to fight against sin. God wants to save us from sin, not condemn us. God is for us, not against us!
I also saw fear, pride and embarrassment keeping my son from apologizing for what he had done. I've also felt that feeling of discomfort, ugh. I could empathize once again with my son. He was so uncomfortable, I was super uncomfortable, he begged me not to go, he cried.... he yelled at me..I'm pretty sure he hated me more than anyone on this planet at the time. There were so many emotions and to be honest It all really sucked..
I almost caved and didn't go, but for some reason I had this feeling that I needed to follow through. I'm so glad I didn't turn back because something amazing happened on the way home from dropping of the apology letter at church. I assumed my son was still super ticked at me because I swear it's never been that quiet in the car before ...EVER 😉 we literally sat in silence for what seemed to be hours before my son spoke up from the backseat. He said, “Mom, you were right, my heart feels so much better now. I'm so much happier and I feel different, but I can’t really explain it…I just wanted you to know that”.
So much more conversation came after that. We got to talk for a long time about God’s work in our lives and in our hearts. How essential prayer is and how important it is to apologize when we are wrong. God has a way of humbling the heart when we do that. I told my son that our mistakes our in our past and we don’t ever have to talk about this specific mistake again. That he worked it out with God and with the person he wronged and now he gets to feel the freedom that brings. What he couldn’t explain in words was the peace that his soul felt. I cried happy tears that day because I saw once again God working in my son’s life and heart. There is nothing more precious than that.
There is something so powerful about forgiveness, apologies, and repentance. It somehow humbles and softens the heart and I saw that first hand when my son spoke up from the backseat. He didn't have that ugly, prideful, angry attitude anymore, but actually he had a much different perspective and attitude all together. I've never been able to change his perspective or attitude… We don't have the power to do that for someone else ... believe me..I wish I could… BUT… it's only the Lord who has the power to work in a person's heart. He's the only One who can really change us deep down. That's why I seek Him so desperately and why I want my family to do the same. We need Him daily to help us fight against sin, to change our perspectives and attitudes and to create in us a heart more like Jesus ❤️
I couldn't do this CRAZY life without you Lord… Thank you 🙌
"I will praise you, Lord, with all my heart I will tell of all the marvelous things you have done."
Psalm 9:1
"Finally, I confessed all my sins to you
and stopped trying to hide my guilt.
I said to myself, “I will confess my rebellion to the Lord.And you forgave me! All my guilt is gone." Psalm 32:5
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